inbox

[candlecutterpikachu]

Hey, this is Mitsutada. I can't pick up right now, so leave a message, okay?

I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

[ voice | video | text | action ]

Comments

[birthmarkless]

[ One second later, however, his grin seems to go away in an instant. Instead, his face is filled with something... downcast. Not quite a grim one, but Ookurikara's face is certainly brimming with doubt.

Which is a doubt for his entire method of dealing with life. ]

But you know... [ The arms behind his head move, and he is now crossing him around in front of his chest. ] ...Even I could hardly fight them alone.

[ His mind quickly flashes the image of what happened back there. He had the upper hands against those monsters once, but he was eventually pushed to the corner. If not for Mutsu, Vietnam, and a lot of people that were there to help him, he would have already be deader than dead right there. That was the moment Ookurikara noticed the lines in the most painful way possible; the very line of his capabilities. Being a loner could only brought him that far.

This place is not the Citadel. He needs to adapt. To survive in this place, he needs to know better than that. He needs to change.

He wants to change. ]

I... kinda ended up being a burden to them there.

[ --But again, he was never an outgoing individual, and admitting this kind of thing was VERY hard for him.

Right. Just see his face now. He's already turning a bit red on his cheek. He totally looks like he's totally lost on what he should do to express his gratitude for those people and Mitsutada, apparently, has become his single ray of hope to ask for life tips for dealing with this kind of thing. Just like the usual. ]

[candlecutterpikachu]

[ Seeing his best friend at ease helped to make him feel less tense, so it comes as a surprise to him when Ookurikara's face falls. He had expected the other to just leave it at that and start talking about something else, but it seems that this discussion isn't over just yet. His expression flickers with surprise for just a moment, before changing into one of concern - because anything that causes that sort of reaction in his friend is something very important. But as he continues listening, full attention focused on the other, that concern starts changing to understanding, and then a fond smile perhaps tinged with pride. These are definitely things he doesn't expect Ookurikara to be saying, but it isn't in a bad way. In fact, it is a good thing.

He had understood the reason his best friend chose to distance himself from others, and could read the other well - but his social ability only went that far, especially since he, too, is a newly sentient being. Throughout their time together, he had always been able to try and help the other somewhat with his issues, but he just wasn't tactful enough to trust his own judgment completely. Just little pushes here and there, staying with Ookurikara when others had given up and left, ultimately things that might have only been temporary measures. There is still something weighing on his best friend's heart, and he knows what it is - but he had always been powerless to change it, all along. Because he can't, and won't want to force the other to change his mindset just like that. It was too complicated and too delicate an issue for him to handle.

To hear these sorts of things from Ookurikara, the admission of faults that his attitude brought, but not in a completely negative way - to call it a relief would be an understatement. Mitsutada is happy for the other, maybe even a little proud. So he's just smiling now, trying to find something suitable to say. A lot of it is still raw emotion, relief blended with hopefulness, as well as a running undertone of concern that he always had for his best friend. ]

It'll get better.

[ In any other situation, this might sound like empty words, but Ookurikara would be able to tell that he really means it. ]

And... you know who they are, right? We can go see them if you want. In the future, you'll be able to do the same for them too.

[ Repay the favour, he means. He's still a little unsure on what exact words he should use, her the general sentiment is there. ]

[birthmarkless]

[ Ookurikara was not jealous. He was never one to be jealous type at all. Or that's what he would like to keep on telling himself. In all honesty and all its glory, however, he's always constantly a bit jealous of Mitsutada's, and the other swords', capabilities of bonding and blending with each other. Not that he actually hated being aloof and introvert on the corner of the Citadel by himself, but at times, it felt rather stagnant and perhaps even boring, even for Ookurikara's standard. He only had himself to blame for not approaching them when he had the chance, of course.

Still, a decision has been made. He wants to change, to adapt to this place. Which means that he needs to swallow most of his own mindset with grain of salt. Hard, but totally necessary,indeed.

Face still filled with crimson shades of embarrassment and awkwardness, he taps his fingers against the table, eyes sharpshooting straight to the side. ]

I... don't know about that, really. It feels rather weird to just go to them like that. [ A hand goes through his hair, scratching them in a good mixture of discomposure and unsureness. ] You know fully well what I mean.

[ Mitsutada would probably understand his intention without needing him to explain the entire fiasco, or at least Ookurikara hoped so. In fact, it's not an understatement here that he's really, really grateful for having one of the best listener with him, but he's still hardly able to let out what he actually wanted to say. Old habit and behavior could hardly die, after all. ]